It was also emotional and hard.
HARD.
Boy, was it hard.
I don't even think I realized how hard it was, until I was on the other side of the newborn days looking back. The first two weeks weren't so bad. We were so busy settling in at home with this new little person, I didn't have time to notice. There were visits and food and lots of help. Then about the third week things seem to slow down and I realized what was going on.
The baby cried.
My boobs hurt.
I cried.
The baby wouldn't sleep.
We both cried.
Lanolin, my bff.
I leaked fluids from too many places.
Nursing pads.
Maxi pads.
There was spit up.
So much spit up.
Where did it all come from?
Burp cloths in every room.
There was no sleep.
Sleep is for quiters.
I want sleep.
Sleep deprivation.
Late night chats with a crying baby.
Weird 3am tv shows.
Bottles, bottle brushes, bottle drying rack.
Nipples, nipples shields, other contraptions.
Diapers, leaky diapers.
Wipes, cream, oil, powder.
Swaddling.
Rocking.
Bouncing.
Riding.
Swinging.
Singing.
Patting.
Pumping.
Feeding.
Washing.
Everything was so new, so foreign, so hard, so wonderfully hard.
Friends, if this is you right now, hang in there. Sometimes you just have to take it a day at a time or even an hour at a time. That precious little one is so worth the work and effort. And it does get easier! Really. I promise! What a wonderful journey you are on my friend.
If this is not you, but you know someone with a newborn here are a few tips to help them out. (after the initial frenzy of family, food and friends has past)
1. Encourage her - if you didn't get it, being a new mom is hard! Send a note, some flowers, or some chocolate. Let her know that she's not alone, she's not forgotten, that you are thinking of and praying for her.
2. Help her - if you see her at church or where ever with a baby carrier, a diaper bag, a purse, etc, go grab something. If you have time to go visit do a few dishes or sweep the floor while you're there. (now I get that this makes some people super uncomfortable, so be sensitive, but if you're close enough friends, just do it)
3. Talk to her - sometimes a new mom just needs some adult conversation. Let her vent or chat about whats going on with her. Call, text, fb, tweet, whatever, just get in touch!
4. Be there for her - let her know that you are really there for her. In the middle of the night if she needs someone to talk to or text. If she has questions or concerns. Be someone that she could easily and comfortably ask for help. (It's hard enough to ask for help and with all the other hard stuff going on, just make it easy, ok?)
5. Get her out of house - offer to hold/watch the baby while she takes a long shower then go out for coffee or a walk in the park or around the mall, go get some lunch with other people.
I am tremendously thankful to my mom who came over many days after she got off work, to hold my baby girl while I slept. And others who encouraged, helped, talked, and were there for me, what a blessing.
Much love to all the mamas!
Lindsey
What was the hardest thing for you as a new mama?
What are some other tips to help new mamas?
The hardest thing for me was managing two newborns at the same time. Once W.C. went back to work after one week, it was all on me both at night and during the day. But, we got a schedule going and I got more confident in handling twins. Now, we have wide-open and healthy 6 year olds! I blinked and they're finishing up kindergarten. It really does go by so fast. My best advice would be to stop and enjoy the wonder of it while you can. They grow so quickly and before you know it they're off to school. That's the one thing I wish I could have done more of instead of being so stressed about it - especially after I went back to work full time when they were only 12 weeks old.
ReplyDeleteAmy